By overwhelming demand, here is what everyone is up to:
(The details of the "Harp Incident" have been removed by author)
KERN COUNTY DRUNKARD: Do not know. Do not care.
RAMPART: Accompanied Waist High and LTD to Acadia, Waist High's favorite restaurant, on Waist High's 37th birthday (3/16). Lectured LTD the entire time. Subjects included, but were not limited to, the value of hard work, sea hags, and his miserable youth in Bakersfield. For the 61st time, Waist High got to hear the story of how he started working when he was 12 years old, "Pulling weeds in the 110 degree heat!"
The next night, Waist High pinched some ska CD's from him which she untruthfully promised to return.
LOVELY TEENAGED DAUGHTER: All in the month of March, LTD got her drivers license, took possession of her father's Volvo station wagon, (which he "gifted" to her for $1,500 if paid in cash, $1,800 if paid in payments), and got a part time job. She continues to maintain a 4.0 GPA, all the while irritating Waist High by doing crap like borrowing Waist High's mascara and then leaving it in a friend's car, not posting EVER on Living With Waist High, refusing to hug me, and COMING HOME AT 4 a.m.
Got a speeding ticket already. IN A SCHOOL ZONE.
Was a little startled to say the least, to find that the IRS and the state of Oregon will regularly take a portion of your paycheck for themselves.
THE STRANGER: Warned Waist High about the "Harp Incident." Told her not to get involved in the situation that ultimately led to the "Harp Incident." Looks out for Waist High. Just discovered Blondie 2 weeks ago.
TRI-TIP: Tri-Tip was the protagonist in the "Harp Incident," which occurred in Nevada. Waist High was told by about 7 people not to go to Nevada with Tri-Tip.
